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Mar 5, 2007

My wife's hearing problem

I've been concerned recently that my wife, Linda, may not be hearing as well as she used to. I've wondered to myself if she might, in fact, need a hearing aid. I wasn't sure about how to approach her on the subject, so I chickened-out and called our family doctor to discuss the problem. He said he really needed to examine her but that there was a simple, informal test that I could perform which would give him a better idea about her hearing loss.
"Here's what you do", said our doctor. "Stand about 40 feet away from her and in a normal, conversational speaking-tone, see if she hears. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response".
That evening, Linda was in the kitchen cooking dinner, which I usually do but that is another story, and I was in the bedroom. I said to myself: "I'm about 40 feet away. Let's see what happens". In a normal tone I asked: "Honey, what's for dinner?" No response, so I stepped into the hallway, about 30 feet from Linda and repeated: "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no response. Next I moved into the dining room where I'm about 20 feet from her and ask: "Honey, what's for dinner" Again, no response. So, I walked to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away: "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no response.
So I walked up right behind her and asked: "Honey, what's for dinner?", to which she replied: "Barry, for the 5th time, CHICKEN!!!"
Well, obviously this story is a joke and my thanks to good friend Peter Marsh for sending it along. Usually, Pete's jokes are lewd, crude and rude, but occasionally he passes along one that I can actually tell in polite company.
And now that I've set tone for this blogabomination, here is another cute story, courtesy of daughter No. 2.
One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the rascally behaviour that was going on. So he called one of his angels and sent the winged spirit to Earth for a time. When the angel returned, he told God: "Yes, it is bad on Earth. 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not". God was not pleased, so he decided to e-mail the 5% who were being good because he wanted to encourage them; give them a little something to help them keep the faith. Do you know what the e-mail said? Okay, I was just wondering -- I didn't get one either.
Please comment if you wish. BtheB


Bigwom said...

I like it best when the blog includes me!

alliecat72 said...

Nothing beats a good chicken joke or a joke with chicken in it. :-)

alliecat72 said...

PS I want equall billing with bigwom!

pebble said...

They are cool! I particularly enjoy the last of the two .. I'm going to try that on my friends :)