A birding poem by Ogden Nash...

Common Towhee - Photo by BarrytheBirder

YOU CAN'T GET THERE FROM HERE

by Ogden Nash

Birdwatchers top my honours list.

I aimed to be one, but I missed.

Since I'm both myopic and astigmatic,

My aim turned out to be erratic, 

And I, bespectacled and binocular, 

Exposed myself to comment jocular.

We don't need too much birdlore, do we,

To tell a flamingo from a towhee;

Yet I cannot, and never will,

Unless the silly birds stand still.

And there's no enlightenment in a tour

Of ornithological literature.

Is yon strange creature a common chickadee,

Or a migrant alouette from Picardy?

You can rush to consult your nature guide

And inspect the gallery inside,

But a bird in the open never looks

Like its picture in the birdie books-

Or if it once did, it has changed its plumage,

And plunges you back into ignorant gloomage.

That is why I sit here growing old by inches,

Watching a clock instead of finches,

But I sometimes visualize in my gin

The Audubon that I audubin.

I came across this witty Nash poem, 
in a blog called Mountain Plover 
written by Leslie Holzmann back in 2009.

Please comment if you wish.

BarrytheBirder